||[Sep. 11th, 2003|06:18 pm]
This morning at the crack of 10:30, I got a call back from one of the places I applied to, for a medical receptionist position in a dental office. The guy asked me if I could come in for an interview this evening and I said sure, because my schedule is obviously as wide open as a cheap hooker's legs right now. He then called me back a few minutes later to say, "Oh yeah, I forgot. Have you ever been convicted of a felony or a misdemeanor? How is your credit? Can you pass a drug test?"
To those I answered, "No," "Good," and "Yes." My real answers? "No," "Why the fuck do you care? Aren't YOU gonna be paying ME?", and "HAHAHAH NOT ON YOUR LIFE." But it's just as well, because after talking to Greg, who's worked in his dad's chiropractor's office for going on 3 years now, I am completely turned off from ever working in health care. That is the biggest mitigating factor in my eyes. I could possibly pass a drug test with a masking agent. However, I will almost certainly hate my health care job as much as Greg hates his, and then I would be right back where I am now.
It's hard not to let unemployment itchiness make you hasty and stupid in your decisions though. It's not even truly an issue of money at this point. I have a good cushion in my checking account, and minimal necessary payments each month. But since age 15 I have never been unemployed with nothing else to do. There have been periods where I've been without a job, but I was always in school during those periods. I'm not complaining at all, just observing how quickly you start to feel worthless when you don't have a job. And "worthless" is even a harsh word. I feel fine about myself in general. But there's something very strange, something that makes you feel like you should be freaking out, when there is nothing to prevent you from listening to Queen and reading novels all day. Granted, I believe rock n' roll and Vonnegut are far more enriching than any job I hold will probably ever be, but you see my point. :)
Anyway. I have very little feeling about the two-year anniversary of 9/11 beyond feeling empathically fucked up. Other than that, today is just a day, albeit a day I'd never turn my television on even if I DID watch regular TV. Of course there is cause to mourn, especially for people who were directly affected by the attacks. But personally I have no interest in mourning or remembering. What I COULD get behind is people taking a hard look at this country and figuring out why the hell that all happened in the first place. But come on, this is America. Learning from mistakes is not our strong point, nor is it the strong point of human beings in general, really. Human nature being what it is, I honestly don't know if there's any alternative to us continuing to further our own extinction, little by little. That sounds horribly fatalistic and cynical, but who says the truth isn't?
It's clear to me that I have been reading a lot of Vonnegut. Haha.
I got a Montgomery County library card yesterday. Checked out a Vonnegut novel, Skinny Legs and All by Tom Robbins (writing style aside, I am seriously intrigued by this guy), and Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace. Have any of you guys read Infinite Jest? Is it worth the 981-page read? I'd like to get some idea before I embark on that.
And that's all I've got.